yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Randomize
