I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
COCAINE IS GR8
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Randomize
