hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
