and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Randomize
