youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize