I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
i think my mom watched the whole time
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
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