You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
