Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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