That's when you crack a 10am beer
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
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