I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize