So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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