So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize