Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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