I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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