So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Randomize
