my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Randomize
