Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
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