What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize