just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
