We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
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