trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
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