it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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