We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
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