Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
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