false alarm. still invincible.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
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