Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
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