I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Holy shit dude........stairs
Randomize