Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
Even the bartender felt bad for me
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
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