I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Randomize
