the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
