i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
