Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
