I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Randomize
