I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Randomize
