I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
