We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
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