I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
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