it wasn't lemon gatorade
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Randomize
