just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
