I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
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I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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