your room smells of hookers.
And success
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
then he tried to convert me to islam
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
