if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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