I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize