dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
Randomize
