That's intense
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
