whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
