so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Randomize
