is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
Randomize
