the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Randomize