if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Of course I have a pirate flag
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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